Don't Hate, Appreciate

Growing up as an only child I always felt like one of the adults. I spent most of my time with older people; I really didn’t have any friends and kids my age picked on me. I wanted so badly to “grow up”, be an adult, and not have to deal with all the unfair hardships of childhood.
By the age of thirteen I was a high school student with a part time job. I wanted to help my family out so I started paying for some of my own toiletries and clothes. I would go out with my friends and use my own money. It was nice. I felt a sense of independence. I liked not having to bother my parents for funds on trivial things. I still had trouble with authority. I did not appreciate being treated like a child, especially by adults that I felt had no moral standing to do so. I still longed for adulthood where I could stay out past curfew, make my own decisions, take care of myself, and not have anyone to answer to.
I realized before I graduated high school that I would never stop having to answer to people, in reality, there would be even more people to answer to as an adult. I was seventeen and a full time college student. My eighteenth birthday was steadily approaching and I was scared. All those years spent wishing my life would pass me by and I quickly became aware that those years not only passed me by, but they flew by at warp speed. What would I be left with? Bills? Taxes? Hardship? This is not what I was wishing for, was it? I take it back! I take back my wish! I don’t want to be old; you can keep your responsibilities!
My eighteenth birthday rolled around, laced with depression and anxiety. Here it is. Adulthood. Not much changed, I had already been paying taxes since I started working so long ago, I was used to taking orders from bosses and professors, and with all the work and school I had on my plate I couldn’t afford the lack of sleep that paired with staying out late. I let myself grow up too fast. But instead of dwelling on what I missed out on as a child I had to decide to just make the best out of every moment from there on.
Take the time to appreciate what you have.

Comments

  1. Shai MonaiMarch 8, 2012 at 6:20 PM

    I love this! I can relate to your feelings. When you're younger, you have no idea of the obstacles that are to come. But, hey, that's life!(:

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sandra De SantiagoMarch 11, 2012 at 1:18 AM

    Its tough but i like the feeling of being independent and knowing i can take care of myself with out needing anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ashley M. CarcamoMarch 12, 2012 at 10:39 PM

    I thought the same way. I still look to being independent but yes not much changed but wow you went all out at a young age! Very cool.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ale landerosMarch 13, 2012 at 9:48 PM

    I thought the same thing and once I had it I kinda didnt want it anymore, I agree with what you say good blog.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Three Important People...just three? That's not fair.

I consider myself lucky to find this assignment so challenging. I have many amazing people in my life; past and present. Relevance varies depending on which aspect of my life I am examining, career goals, personal values, school success, or extra curricular projects.             I can think of one person who has been there for all of it, I’m sure some of you have guessed already, my Mommy. She is one of the most beautiful people I know. She’s five feet and two inches full to the brim of passion, compassion, spunk, adventure, courage, experience, and knowledge. My Mom is 41 as of March of this year but acts closer to a 30 year old in the best ways possible. She has shoulder length brown hair but you may find it at her lower back if she is growing it out to donate it to cancer patients. She tells me if I look closely at her grey hairs I can see descriptions on them; the day I got my license, the day I started high school, the day I...
Read more

The next best thing to diving with the Great Whites...

I woke up before the sun had come up, which normally I would not be happy about. Not today, today I was grinning ear to ear. I tie on my suit, gather my snorkel gear and my 4/3 (a thin wetsuit), and hop into the car. We get to the dock on the western most point on the island just in time to see one of the most beautiful sunrises I’ve ever seen. Definitely was on my “top ten sunrises of my lifetime” list. I took a couple pictures, but it really didn’t do it justice.  We take a look at the “cage” I’ll be diving in.  It had two thin round aluminum hoops on the top and bottom with thin fraying nylon netting around the sides and bottom of the cage.  The nylon netting was full of gaping holes.  My Mom started freaking out, to be honest it was much less than I was expecting too, and the captain assured her that they’ve never had an issue before.  I stepped aboard, hugged my Mom and Dad goodbye, and we headed out for a shallow reef about three hours off shor...
Read more